


Resolution

by Patricia_Sage



Series: Taako Alone [4]
Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: Campaign: Balance (The Adventure Zone), Disabled Taako (The Adventure Zone), Gen, Memory Loss, POV The Director | Lucretia, Post-Episode: e067-069 Story and Song Parts 1-3, Sad Taako (The Adventure Zone), Sad The Director | Lucretia, Spoilers, Spoilers for Episode: e060-066 The Stolen Century Parts 1-7, Spoilers for Episode: e067-069 Story and Song Parts 1-3, Taako Angst (The Adventure Zone), Taako Character Study (The Adventure Zone), Taako Has Chronic Pain (The Adventure Zone), Taako Has Feelings (The Adventure Zone), Taako Has Issues (The Adventure Zone), The Director | Lucretia Angst, The Director | Lucretia is a Mess, The Director | Lucretia-centric
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-25
Updated: 2021-01-25
Packaged: 2021-03-17 07:40:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,221
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28970718
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Patricia_Sage/pseuds/Patricia_Sage
Summary: "I understand why you felt like you couldn’t tell the others. They would have had a whole existential argument about.” Taako sits down in the chair opposite her and leans his staff against her desk. “But, Lucy, surely you know that my moral compass is just an arrow pointing toward Lup.”[another apology. an unexpected outcome.]
Relationships: Lup & Taako (The Adventure Zone), The Director | Lucretia & Taako
Series: Taako Alone [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2031121
Comments: 2
Kudos: 37





	Resolution

It feels strange to write in her journals again. Lucretia has been documenting everything for so long, but when a century’s worth of your words gets erased from the world and then later projected to every living person…it feels a little strange.

There’s a knock on her office door. She puts down her pens. “Come in.”

Taako’s hat pokes through. “Hey, Director.”

“Taako, please,” she admonishes. She hates when he calls her that…and he knows it. He does it to tease her.

When he enters the room, there’s an uncharacteristic seriousness to him. Lucretia feels her spine straighten. “Can we…can we talk? About. You know.” His shoulders are high and he's fidgeting with the rings on his fingers.

She doesn’t want to say it in case she’s wrong. She doesn’t want to have this conversation if she doesn’t have to. He’s avoiding her eyes. He takes a breath to steel himself and begins speaking.

"I understand why you felt like you couldn’t tell the others. They would have had a whole existential argument about.” Taako sits down in the chair opposite her and leans his staff against her desk. “But, Lucy, surely you know that my moral compass is just an arrow pointing toward Lup.”

Looking at her wrinkled hands is infinitely easier than looking him in the eye. In her dreams she sees his face when he was inoculated – she’d never seen such betrayal and heartbreak directed toward her before. But Taako is resigned in this moment while he continues to speak. “I would have helped you, no questions asked, if it meant that I could keep looking for her. And when I found that umbrella, I would have known she was there!” Her heart aches with regret. “And that’s why I’m so mad. She spent ten fucking years trapped in there, helpless and alone. I spent ten years wandering around, helpless and _alone_.” His voice breaks and Lucretia can’t stop herself from looking up at him then. He’s holding his hat in his lap and staring at it, but she can see the hurt and regret on his dark features. “We’d never been apart from each other, not in over 200 years of life. Do you know what that’s like?” His eyes meet hers. She shakes her head.

“I don’t mean to make it all about me; everybody went through shit. But you hurt me in a way no one has ever hurt me…in a way I didn’t think anyone could.”

This conversation is different from the others they’ve had. Taako has been cordial, inviting her to every family event, chatting with her about the Bureau of Benevolence, baking her sweets on Candlenights. But there’s a look in his eyes sometimes when he catches himself from falling into old fondness. He’ll smile at her when she laughs at one of his jokes, but then he’ll be reminded, and the warmth will fade. And sometimes there’s sharp, offhand remarks when he’s drunk. She knows him very well, knows how he protects himself with barbed wire, and she knows he’s making a conscious effort not to lash out. Honestly, that’s all she can expect of him.

But this is different. He’s open and vulnerable, prying open his hard shell to reveal his soft and injured insides. She doesn’t feel doused in shame like she usually does when she thinks of it. She feels awful but secure. She releases that feeling in a few simple words.

“You’re right.”

His dark eyes meet hers. The shadows on his face are pronounced beneath his scarred, freckled skin. Fighting for the planar system had taken its toll and they both look older in different ways.

Lucretia lets her feelings slowly pour out of her mouth. “I hurt everyone.” ( _I weighed the pros and cons. It was for your own good._ No. She’s said that enough and it doesn’t help.) “But you and the Captain got the worst of it. I understand that you might never forgive me, Taako. And it took me a while but I’m at peace with that. If I’m being honest, I appreciate you being so transparent with me. I know where you stand; I know you care for me and I know you’re still hurt. Those two things can coexist.” Taako nods, uncharacteristically quiet and still.

Lucretia runs her hands through her short, white curls. She doesn’t have time for long, intricate hairstyles like she did on the Starblaster. “Davenport told me he forgives me. But he doesn’t.” She tries to keep the despair out of her voice, even though she feels it crawling up from her lungs. “I can tell he’s lying. And, Taako, that hurts me so much more. I’d rather we rebuild like you and I, hesitant but…honest.”

She reaches out and offers her hand to him, resting against the wood of her desk. Taako purses his lips but places his ringed fingers carefully on her calloused palm. Neither of them close their hands, leaving it as a loose connection. “I shouldn’t have taken Lup away from you,” she says. “I shouldn’t have taken away your sister, your heart, your entire support system.” Tears gather in the corners of Taako’s eyes, but he holds her gaze. Every other time she’s apologized, Lucretia has followed it with a justification ( _I needed to do it because you wouldn’t have stopped looking for her_ ), but this time she doesn’t. “You’re right. I should have talked to you. We could have worked together. I panicked, Taako. And I never really stopped to think about how erasing Lup would devastate you. I am _so_ sorry.”

They sit in silence for a minute, sharing space and lost in thought. Taako’s thin fingers are cold and still. Lucretia jumps when he suddenly clasps her hand. “Come on, I’m craving hot chocolate.”

“Alright.”

They make quite the pair as they walk down the Bureau’s halls, both leaning on their staffs and holding hands with the other. Taako leads Lucretia to the kitchen island and then releases her, but she doesn’t feel a distance when he steps away. It’s as if they’ve created a bubble around them filled with an overwhelming combination of tension and trust. She doesn’t feel compelled to run like she has in the past.

The drink is made with dark chocolate and cinnamon – her favourite, exactly how he used to make it for her on the Starblaster. Lucretia remembers one cycle where she, Merle, and Taako were the only ones left for the last few months. That was when she realized just how much Taako draws energy from those around him. That cycle was filled with board games and philosophical conversations, teaching each other new skills. It was early on in their journey and Lucretia realized that Lup and Taako were quite different. When they’re together, they create almost an entirely new entity, cohesive and bright.

Taako sits across from her takes a sip from his mug. He was quiet and inwardly focused in the silence. He softly interrupts her thoughts. “Yeah, okay. I forgive you.”

He means it. Lucretia feels her heart stop. “Really?”

“Yeah.”

Things don’t go back to how they were. They never will. She can’t take back what happened and Taako will always live with the consequences. But he lets himself love her again.


End file.
